Have you ever been whipped into line?

Have you ever been whipped into line?

The person probably thought they were helping.
Instead, they were stifling.

I recently read this quote, shared from X by Dr. Julie Gurner on Substack:

“𝘔𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴𝘯’𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦.

𝘖𝘳 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘴𝘰 𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘭𝘺 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨.

𝘖𝘳 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘴𝘱𝘰𝘬𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘮𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘥𝘭𝘺 𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘴𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮.

𝘔𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘶𝘱 𝘰𝘯 𝘢 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘯𝘰𝘯-𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦, 𝘰𝘳 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘴𝘦, 𝘴𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘤 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘵.”

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𝗜𝘁 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗽𝗽𝗲𝗱 𝗺𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗹𝗱.
Because I’ve been on the flip side of that.

“You’re a bit intense.”
“Try to be more relatable.”
“Don’t aim too high… be realistic.”

Looking back, I realise now ... I wasn’t wrong.
It was just 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗳𝗲𝗹𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗱 𝗯𝘆 𝗺𝘆 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘃𝗶𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻.

They want you to paint your masterpiece in beige.
You start vibrant. Loud colours. Bold strokes.
And little by little, they get you to blend in.

Eventually, 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝗮𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘀𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂’𝗿𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗴.
Because it feels safer to fit in than to stand out.

𝗕𝘂𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁.

It starts when you stop apologising for who you are.
When you realise that 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗱𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸 𝗶𝘀𝗻’𝘁 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗱𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸 ... 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝗳𝗲𝗮𝗿.
And that 𝗯𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 “𝘁𝗼𝗼 𝗺𝘂𝗰𝗵” 𝗶𝘀 𝗼𝗳𝘁𝗲𝗻 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗯𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗹𝗲.

I was lucky enough, later, to have managers, mentors, and guides.

They saw a different, bigger version of me and my potential.
They didn’t flinch. They didn’t ask me to turn it down.
They helped me turn it up.

Over time, it changed the course of my work ... and my mission.
Because now? I do the same thing for other people.
Specifically, those who are relentless achievers.

𝗡𝗼𝘄 𝗮𝘀𝗸 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳:

What would become possible if I stopped holding back?

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